Thursday, 6 January 2011

Rantings of an emotionally drained amateur runner...

Today again was a tough day, I'm starting to see a pattern here. 

Finished work and straight to the gym, in honesty I really wasn't feeling up to it but needs must. After the day I had had a work, and work getting increasingly on my last nerve I wasn't in the best frame of mind. So I headed to the gym and did my usual stretches and hit the treadmill for my 5k run in my grumpus mood and low and behold I found it a massive struggle. I think I'm starting to set unrealistic goals for my running progress in my head as I really hoped that by now I would be loving it and not feeling so tired/dizzy/breathless by the 3.5k point, heck I think I even hoped I'd feel good at the end of the 5k but not such luck. I'm finding it just as tough as when I started.

I made the decision last night I was going to pop back to my parents' house and I'm glad I did, coming home to my Mom and Dad is sometimes just what I need, cried it all out whilst they said supportive parent things like 'you're doing very well' 'I wish I could run like you' etc etc whilst listening to me moan about work/running/money/the vat increase/dinner - I think I just started getting petty. I was feeling really rubbish about my progress and v. worried I won't be able to do the half in March, then I called Alex and he reminded me I've been back at running for only 6 days... 6 days... it's so true. I really need to remind myself that progress isn't easy, if it was then it would be progression. Duh.

I'm getting fed up with running at the gym, for one there are too many people I know that go to my gym and I really don't see it as a place to socialise, two I find running on a treadmill ridiculously boring and three running next to people on the treadmill who put their incline to highest then hold on to the bars as they walk drive me mad. So I'm really looking forward to the weekend cause it means me and Alex can run together outside again, I think I'm embracing the cold it's so much better than feeling hot and sweaty.

Lessons learnt today: My mood seriously effects my running ability. My parents are the most supportive people in the entire world and I take them for granted all too easily. I need to be realistic when it comes to running progression. I really need a good nights sleep.

So amongst all the negativity tomorrows a new day and heres hoping for a better run! Sending good vibes to all Janathoners!! Day 7 here were come.

1 comment:

  1. You're doing brilliantly - well done!
    The progress will come piecemeal: you'll feel like you're not making progress, and then all of a sudden you'll take a little leap forward. There's no logic to it.
    And you're right, getting outside will definitely help!